As we celebrate the 20000 women who marched to the Union Buildings in Pretoria on August 9, 1956, I wonder how far we have really come as women. Constitutionally and legally we have all the rights on paper and it is such a privilege to live in a country where human rights are respected and constitutionally enforced. But have we really come that far? The majority of women in our country don’t have the means to access these laws. Neither are they aware of them. Many are repressed, fearful and vulnerable. And the most vulnerable of these is the mother.
Consider the single mother trying to receive maintenance contributions from her children’s father. She earns R100 per day. Transport for her and her two children to work and school amounts to R55 per day. Going to the courts means a day off work, which is less R100 plus extra transport costs. Only to hear from the administrative clerks at court that her maintenance court order will take up to a year to enforce. And then in a year’s time, when the order is enforced and he refuses to pay, it will be more days off work spent in court. In the meantime, she has children to clothe and feed, school- and doctor’s fees to pay.
Consider the woman raped and impregnated by a police officer, too afraid to speak out and accuse this man at the same police station where he works with his friends. She seeks an abortion, only to be told that it’s too late. During her pregnancy she discovers that she is now HIV positive. She gives birth to a healthy son and names him Gift.
Consider the 40-year-old woman forced by her alcohol and drug-addicted husband to have her eighth child, because he needs the R225 per month per child government grant to support his habit. Her last baby is born with down’s syndrome, a special needs baby and an added burden to an already overwrought, overworked, poor and tired mother.
Consider the young mother who was told that it would ease labour pains to use tik (crystal meth) during the birth of her baby.
Consider the 16-year-old girl, pregnant and HIV positive. When asked whether they were educated about HIV and the use of condoms, she admits that what she believed was that you use condoms only if you sleep around, not if you have one stable boyfriend. She believed her boyfriend of 2 years was faithful.
These are all women we have met at our breastfeeding groups and in the hospital over the last few months. It begs the question this Women’s Day: do we really have reason to celebrate?
I don’t think so. I think we still have a long struggle ahead.
Our volunteers from Bosom Buddies meet 400 women per month. We bless them with a gift, love them without judgment and pray for them and their babies. It is a small start, but definitely not insignificant.
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