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| Zoleka teaching on the importance of breastfeeding at a support group |
Today, Zoleka is 34 years old and has three kids. She is married and lives with her husband, George, whom she met 1998.
Zoleka met Frances Fuchs, the manager of Bosom Buddies, while she was working for another NGO (non-governmental organisation), Mothers To Mothers, that counsels women who are HIV+. She is happy today that she spoke with Frances when her contract with Mothers to Mothers was coming to an end. She accepted the offer to work for Bosom Buddies in April 2012.
This is just a bit of Zoleka’s story.
Please tell me about yourself.
I grew up living with my mother, grandmother and uncle as social outcasts. My mother had me when I was 15 years old and then my father left her and went on with his life. My mother was forced to drop out of school to raise me and became a domestic worker [cleaning houses]. My grandmother also was a domestic worker. My uncle used to sell newspapers at robots [traffic lights].
When I was thirteen or fourteen and in Standard 5 [grade 5], I had to drop school to look after my mother after she’d had a stroke. She passed away that year and I tried to get back into school in Standard 6. The next year, my grandmother had a heart attack and passed away, too. We’d been living in a one-room shack.
I dropped out of school at Grade 10 because I had no support system and then got a job at a supermarket where was paid a total of R98 [around $10] for working a day and a half. After a while, I got more hours and was able to work for three days for R198 [around $20]. I worked there for five years and it was while I was working at this supermarket that I met my husband, George.
In 2010, I heard that Mothers To Mothers was hiring. They required a Grade 10 education as well as fluency in English, Afrikaans, and Xhosa. Since I could speak all languages, I applied and went for an interview. After two days, I was told I qualified for the job, over other applicants who had finished Grade 12 and beyond! I still don’t know why they picked me, but thank God for it.
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| Expectant mother reading our pamphlet |
When I first met Frances Fuchs, I was helping a woman from the Eastern Cape who had been raped by a policeman and as a result became pregnant, as well as HIV+. I was heartbroken by her story and asked Frances to help her. Frances agreed and our friendship began then, while I was still at Mothers To Mothers.
Many mothers that give birth in government hospitals do not have clothes for the babies and when they leave the hospital, must carry the baby home inside their own clothes. Frances would bring bags of supplies for these mothers in Macassar where I worked with Mothers To Mothers. We also started a breastfeeding support group together at that hospital a short while later and in 2012, Frances offered me a job at Bosom Buddies.
Was there something like Bosom Buddies for you when you had your first baby?
There was nothing! I tell the ladies I work with now, “You are so fortunate! In my time, there was no one to tell us about breast-feeding, how to have a healthy pregnancy, safe sex, and all those things.” There was only a sister [nurse] to tell us whether or not we were pregnant. We didn’t even feel like we could ask how our baby was doing because no one had told us that we could ask those questions. When I was pregnant with my first daughter in 2001, the woman who gave the ultrasound didn’t even ask me if I wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl. The doctors and nurses acted as if it was not our business to ask questions, and I did not have the courage to ask.
At Bosom Buddies, I can tell the women that it is their right and responsibility to ask questions and to learn. During labor, it is okay to ask the nurse how many centimeters you are dilated so you can prepare better for the birth. Sometimes the nurses can be intimidating, but you can still ask. We want to empower them to press for the information they need.
Yes, I would breastfeed! With my firstborn, I didn’t want to eat and was very stressed because I didn’t have the support of my mother and father. I didn’t know how to care for my child. I didn’t breastfeed because I didn’t know how to do it and formula-fed her instead. I started to mix feed and feed her porridge at two weeks old. Because of malnutrition, she didn’t gain weight and at six months old she was still wearing newborn clothes.
If money weren’t an issue, what would you do with your life?
I would educate people more and more and more. I want to teach them about the importance of breastfeeding. I want to teach them about the dangers of HIV and how to avoid it and care for it. It’s a very big problem here and even though people don’t want to talk about it, it is very real.
