April News

Our volunteers meet hundreds of moms each month and it is not often that we see them again once they leave the hospital. We hope to make a difference to their birth stories, to honour this wonderful day and to recognise that every birth is a celebration and is important. Do you remember the day your babies were born? Ask that question to every mother (and father) you meet and they can describe to you in vivid detail the stories of their babies’ births. And that’s as it should be! These are the biggest moments of our lives, and meant to be remembered and retold.

It is not any different for the moms we meet in the public hospitals. Sometimes it is so hectically busy in the maternity ward that we seem to forget what big moments we share with these mothers.

Imagine the scene: 6 women in various stages of labour, 2 of them in the final stages with babies about to be born, 15 mothers who have given birth in the past 12 hours, some by caesarean, who need extra attention, plus 10 women with special needs, kangaroo babies. This scene is not spectacular by any means, but it is the almost daily scene of our maternity ward at Helderberg Hospital. It is here where you will find our wonderful midwives, 2 per shift, and staff nurses doing their thing in calm, quiet efficiency. A lot is said and criticised about sisters and nurses in our public healthcare system, and I know that often you will find inadequacy and disrespect, but I have to insist that we have never witnessed that in our 2 hospitals, Helderberg and Macassar Day Hospital. The patients here are treated with kindness and patience. This is not to say that there are never tense moments, if a baby is in distress and needs to be delivered quickly and a mother is not cooperating, sometimes staff needs to act in a strict manner. Also, remember that the level of education of our mothers is often below standard and it can be terribly frustrating having to work with them.

In May we celebrate Midwives’ Day and Nurses Day and I think they definitely deserve a HUGE thank you for all they do! And also a big thanks for allowing our volunteers and visitors in their wards. I do hope that we don’t get in the way, that we are an asset to the ward and that we will foster this friendship between Bosom Buddies and our hospitals for a very long time.

Also in May it’s time again for Bosom Buddies’ big annual fundraiser. This year we are doing a dinner, dance and auction with a Dazzle theme. So put on your dancing shoes, throw on the bling and come join us for a night of gourmet food, excellent wine, exciting goodies on auction an amazing DJ and a cash bar! Tickets are only R200 per person, so no excuse for not being there….unless you live in another country that is!

Please contact me at doulafrances@thembalitsha.org.za or 0827691380 or check out the events section on Thembalitsha’s facebook page for more information. We hope to see you there!

March News

support group in full swing

Bosom Buddies was founded 6 years ago when founder Mel Novitzkas was training to be a doula (childbirth companion). In her practical training at Helderberg Hospital, she realised how many women have nothing when they go to the hospital to give birth. Nothing for their babies, or for themselves in terms of sanitary products. In South Africa, you often see women wearing towels or thick blankets around their bodies. These are to protect them from their monthly bleeding. A simple thing such as sanitary towels becomes a luxury in certain poor communities. An essential after giving birth, a packet of sanitary towels will be found as a part of our dignity gift to new moms who give birth at our local public hospital. In her Bosom Buddies bag, she will find everything for at least a comfortable first day with her baby – a set of newborn clothes, a baby blanket, some nappies, sanitary towels and perhaps a baby product or soft toy if we have one.

When I did my training as a doula 2 years ago, I realised how many women KNOW nothing when they go to the hospital to give birth. Nothing about pregnancy, how to care for herself, nothing about the birth process and very little except for myths and hearsay about caring for a newborn. I realised that so many women struggle with long and fear-filled labours, simply because their adrenaline levels are so high as to prolong the labour. Adrenaline is the enemy of a smooth labour. Women need a safe space, to feel loved and empowered in order for their endorphins to do what they’re meant to do in terms of pain relief. Which is why I am such a passionate teacher. Yes, it is terribly tough at times, since it is a struggle against ancient beliefs and influences and even culture. In South Africa, our babies are not only dying from HIV/Aids, but from misinformation, and lack of knowledge. Babies are started on solids at 1 or 2 weeks of age. Mix-feeding (mixing of breastmilk and formula) is prevalent. Our babies are dying from gastro and other illnesses that are 100% preventable!
Our mothers need to be empowered and taught. We need to constantly struggle along with them and, above all, teach and love unconditionally.

Thank you to all our friends who support our antenatal courses and breastfeeding mothers’ support groups.

Also a huge big thank you to our friends from Australia, Angel Baby, who have sent AUD$158 all the way from there. What a fantastic gesture of support and love for our Babies Born Sleeping initiative. Thank you Angel Baby. This means a lot to us.

February News

A friend asked me recently if the work I do doesn’t get me down. Well, to answer this is complicated. I love and have a real passion for Bosom Buddies. I love meeting the new moms, collecting their stories and cooing over the babies. I enjoy praying for them and obviously it is a pleasure to bless them with our Bosom Buddies bag. I have grown quite fond of the staff at both Helderberg Hospital and Macassar and try to foster and grow these relationships as colleagues and friends. My volunteers are priceless and my staff is precious and valued. Fundraising is hard, but we have been provided for every single month and have not once gone without something we need. Just last month we ran out of sanitary towels (one of our biggest expenses and an absolute essential in our bags) and had to go without for two hospital visits before a mountain full arrived at our door! You see, God always provides. Tuli asked me in the morning if it is time to start praying for sanitary pads and I said I’ve been praying for weeks but please go ahead. That afternoon the truck pulled in, a literal answer to our prayer.

I am asked how I can bear dressing a stillborn baby or endure a grieving mother’s tears on my shoulder. It is by the grace of God only that I have grown strong. I take myself away from the grimness of the sluice room, the baby wrapped in plastic surrounded by dirty laundry and am thankful for the opportunity that this child will at least have a last gentle, loving touch. That he/she is leaving evidence of a LIFE. I take his/her footprint to be remembered by the mother, that she will have something to cling to, to cry over and to remember her baby by. This process is somehow liberating and comforting.

What does get me down is ignorance and prejudice and intolerance. People are often quick to judge and condemn, without sufficient information or a full, clear picture, without having walked in the other person’s shoes. Statements like “they should all be sterilised” or “why do they keep having babies when they can’t afford them?” or “if you can’t feed them, don’t breed them” are the worst forms of bigotry and narrow-mindedness I have come across. What about “it is probably better that the baby did not survive?"

Is my grief more severe, true or deeper than yours simply because I am white middle-class and have a university degree? Do ‘these people’ deserve their children less than you or I? Do ‘they’ deserve inferior medical care and scary, horrible birth experiences? Do ‘they’ need counselling after the loss of a child?

Strange that in all my time spent in townships, gang-filled and traditionally ‘unsafe’ areas, I have been welcomed courteously and it is only in the suburban malls and tea rooms that I come across this small-mindedness and bias. Strange and sad.

Cape Summer Trail Series Championship

WE DID IT!







Our MILES FOR MOMS team ran a very successful final two races in the Cape Summer Trail Series of 2012.



Race 4 on Wednesday 1 Feb, at Tygerberg, was once again a challenge in that the wind was howling. We met some our steepest ascents and yet again one of our team members was sick on the mountain. Well done to Jan Scholtz who perservered in spite of feeling miserable and finished his race. This goes to prove that these runs are definitely not a joke and a real, definite, absolute challenge.

For our final race on 5 Feb at Oak Valley, Grabouw, we were joined by some friends and our team was a force to reckon with! Thanks to all friends of Bosom Buddies for joining us, in particular Neil Cox who ran along for 3 races, Emily House, who did her speedy thing at both Grabouw events and all the other happy faces on the picture above.

Three of us qualified for the championship medal and in case you were waiting for final results before you sponsor us, here it is:
Anthony Geard ran a total of 64.85 km and placed 17th in his category for the championship.
Ben van Rensburg also ran 64.8 km and placed 26th for the championship (please bear in mind that Ben had to keep me company for 2 runs!).
Myself, Frances, missed race 2, so my total km's are 51.6 km and I have placed 20th in the championship!
Adventure boot camp trainer, Miena van Zyl, did an incredible time of 2 hrs 49 minutes for the 25 km xterra super long run and have an amazing 7th place for this race!

If you still don't know how to sponsor us, follow this link:


http://www.givengain.com/activist/69386/projects/2172/

Or you can go straight to the Bosom Buddies bank account with your EFT. Please put as reference your name, as well as the person you sponsor.

Bosom Buddies
Nedbank
Acc: 1141018144
Branch: 114145

Why are we raising this money? 2012 is the year of empowerment for Bosom Buddies! We have developed a fantastic antenatal course, aimed specifically at women from our local townships. We are starting our first course in Sir Lowry's Pass Village on 21 February with 10 pregnant women from the village. We are facilitating a support group as well as an antenatal course in Macassar and aim to grow further into our townships and Grabouw from middle of 2012. In order to do this, we have employed a wonderful experienced and gifted woman. I am raising funds to cover her salary for the year, as well as transport and printing costs for the manuals.
This is more than a dream, this is a passion and a calling. We NEED to do this. Our volunteers meet so many women with premature babies, stillbirths or infant deaths. A lot of these cases can be prevented by teaching women how to properly take care of themselves and their babies during pregnancy and in the early months.

Please help us fulfill this, let us reach our goal.

Cape Summer Trail Series 3 of 5

Silvermine West

Our third run was a happy occasion. It was good to overcome my fears after getting sick on the mountain at our first run. I had a lovely time and did not do too badly! Well done to Anthony Geard with a fantastic time of 1hr 16 mins for this 11.8km, doing the MILES FOR MOMS team proud!

Please remember why we are doing this - to raise some much-needed funds in order to facilitate the antenatal courses we are starting in Sir Lowrys Pass, Macassar, and more this year. We are aiming to raise R60 000, which will enable us to do this.

You can support us here: http://www.givengain.com/activist/69386/projects/2172/

January News

We have had another incredible holiday season, witnessing Christmas and New Year’s babies being born. Sincere and heartfelt thanks to our incredible volunteers who ensured that only 1 scheduled holiday visit was missed. I’m so proud of Bosom Buddies!

Smiling Faces this Christmas

2012 is starting with excitement in the air for Bosom Buddies. We are starting our antenatal courses in early February in Macassar and Sir Lowry’s Pass. Our manual is ready to be printed, we have been blessed by donations  of cups and an urn to be able to make tea for our classes. In a sentence: we are ready!
Let’s not forget why this is so important: at every single hospital visit, our volunteers meet mothers with premature babies, sick babies or stillborn babies – most of which is preventable. Antenatal care is available at clinics all through the Helderberg, but sadly the clinic sisters do not have time to discuss all do’s and don’ts of pregnancy with every single patient. There is no talk of classes. In the private sectors, most mothers (and fathers too!) are encouraged to attend childbirth education classes. These are offered by most private hospitals, usually over 6/8-week periods. Moreover, most mothers giving birth in the private sector are better educated (please excuse my generalization, but this is largely true), and have better access to the internet and educational books. They read up and talk about pregnancy. They know what to eat, how to exercise, to not smoke, drink, use drugs etc. They know what to expect during labour and birth.  The poor woman in the township does not have this. She sees how it’s done by her sister, aunt, mother and friends and in this is the central issue: there is a culture of existence, rather than searching to LIVE. Sadly. At Bosom Buddies we have dreamed for a long time to tackle this. We have attempted classes before, but these did not work out. There are further challenges. Language, culture, class and this attitude of simply being with no curiosity or longing for learning. It is hard to explain. I suppose our foreign readers will struggle to understand.

This is why I am so excited about our new venture: We are not expecting anyone to come to us to learn – we are going to them. I am going to Macassar, to Sir Lowry’s Pass, into someone’s house, where I will be talking to her and her friends about pregnancy, about birth, about breastfeeding and taking care of her baby. We will have tea, we will laugh and complain and we will learn. The hope is that these women will then be ambassadors in the communities and spread the knowledge.

Please continue praying for Bosom Buddies. Although I love what I do, I love the moms, I love the babies and the nurses and my colleagues, it is challenging and sometimes it’s pretty hard.

Cape Summer Trail Series 2 of 5

This past Sunday our runners ran at Lebanon Forest in Grabouw, and I’m happy to say that the race went without any incident. I was still unwell so had to call in my lovely sister-in-law Sigi van Rensburg to run in my place, which she did super well.

We had a full team: Anthony Geard had a fantastic time for the 13.4km and was the first of our MILES FOR MOMS runners in. He was followed very closely by Ben van Rensburg, and then in was Adventure Bootcamp trainer running for Bosom Buddies Miena van Zyl with a 18th overall ranking in her category, Jan Scholtz and Emily House. Well done team!

An update on funds raised: we have started receiving some funds, and I wholeheartedly thank our sponsors. I am leading in this race, with Miena close on my heals. Come on friends, support our runners!